Are there times when you wish your
relationship was more relaxed, without having to explain where you are and when
you will be home? Do you sometimes even want to flirt? If you answered yes to
these questions, you might be the right person for an open relationship.
What is an open relationship
The main idea of this type of
couple is that each person should be happy for themselves, feeling free to do
what makes them happy, and at the same time, the couple should be even happier
when they are together. In short, committed, but also free.
First, think
about whether your relationship is strong enough in case you decide to open it
at some point. The reasons for considering such relationships are usually
because you are tired of something or bored. In other words - by giving
yourself some freedom, you have decided that this way you can strengthen your
relationship even more. Or you just try what will work out, usually by meeting
someone else who attracts you. Then you will be able to answer the question of
whether it is better to just break up.
The rules of an open relationship
Start with an open conversation
with each other. Set your own rules. Listen to your partner's. If you agree
with the joint conditions that you have outlined, this is already a successful
start. It is important to be completely honest before starting this adventure.
How much to
share - Whether you want to share who is doing what and with whom, or whether
you do not want to and listen or reveal similar things in turn, is a mandatory
clarification. You must both be fully aware of what your conversations will be
about everything that happens outside your relationship. Otherwise, you will
only encounter scandals and contradictions.
Make a list of
forbidden and mandatory things. There are relationships in which the partners
are free to flirt with whomever they want, but not to cross the threshold of
the bedroom of the person concerned, but to limit themselves to flirting. There
are also such couples in which both are free to have intimate relations with
whomever they want, without this interfering with the intimate relations
between them. Some set rules for themselves such as "not to sleep with people
we both know or in our home". One of the mandatory things is the use of
condoms. Therefore, here too, it is very important to specify the prohibitions
and to respect them accordingly.
Think about
jealousy. If you are subject to it, it is almost unthinkable to agree to such a
relationship. If, on the other hand, you are firmly determined to have an open
relationship, prepare yourself for the fact that you may experience this
unpleasant feeling. No matter how much you claim that it does not matter what
your partner does, if he seems happy with others, at some point you cannot help
but start to be jealous...at least a little. Usually then everything falls
apart, or the relationship starts over, but without the open
"window".
The most
important thing - just as you started a conversation at the beginning of the
open relationship, if you feel the need, talk freely about the end of the
experiment. Regardless of whether it will be a breakup or a return to the old
situation. If it doesn't work out for you, don't struggle, but end it.
An open
relationship is more of a way to be alone and at the same time not to be
lonely. But if we feel this way, is this approach correct? If we feel such a
need to open our relationship, there is hardly any real love in it. What about
the rest, the people we meet along the way? Are we not playing with their hopes
for a real relationship, declaring that we are both committed and not quite. In
most cases, people get so confused in their own emotions, thoughts and feelings,
maintaining such a relationship, that at some point they stop having healthy
relationships with anyone.
Everyone chooses
for themselves how they want to love and be loved. They say that giving someone
freedom is the highest form of love. Yes, it is. But in my opinion, the one who
truly loves will not exactly accept an open relationship as the highest
expression of love and will never perceive himself as a chained slave if he has
felt the beauty of true love. The one who loves with all his soul will only be
free when he feels that he is loved in the same way, without wanting to cross
the threshold of a true and mature relationship.
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